Happy Birthday

As Benjamin's first birthday is here I'm having a lot of mixed emotions. I cannot believe its been a year since he came into the world. While we were in the middle of it all it obviously didn't feel like time was passing fast, but now that a year has come and gone I can hardly believe it. I am so incredibly thankful for the gift that he is. He is such a blessing to our family. He is beautiful and healthy and vibrant. He is acting like a normal baby and enjoying life the way he should be now. I watch him as he plays, he is so inquistive and curious and its beautiful. We are so blessed. I am reminded often of the fragility of life...when I think back at Benjamin's life so far I find it hard to look at pictures. I think about all that his little body has endured the past year..I wonder how he endured it all. I know this is a testament to God's amazing love. I have learned so much about myself, my strength as a mother, as a person. I have learned so much about my husband, his strength as a father, as a person. He has been my rock. He is the only one who really understood me and what we were going through. I learned so much about my faith. I have learned for certain that I could not have gotten through this on my own...never. God was with me every step of the way. I felt Him.. I felt Him there with me in the hours I spent beside Benjamin's isolet. I felt Him there when we waited during surgeries..I felt Him when the doctors told us Benjamin might not make it. I was never alone and I am so thankful for that.

As I close this chapter in Benjamin's life I look forward to what this new year holds for him. I look forward to less appointments with specialist. I look forward to spending more time loving my son. I anticipate amazing things for my little prince. I know he will do great things in his life. I feel so lucky to be his mother. I can't even explain the bond I have with him and the love I know he has for me..I can see it when he looks at me.

I want to take time to thank everyone who has prayed for us...the countless prayers. The power of prayer is evident. I am eternally grateful. I appreciate the cards, phone calls, care packages, meals and emails. Not one of them went unnoticed. I hope you all know that you made a difference in our lives. I am so thankful for my family and for the few close friends that persevered through with us, you are my heroes and I am so thankful for you. I am so incredibly thankful for the doctors and nurses who dedicate their lives to save the lives of premature babies. Without them Benjamin would not be here. There is no doubt in my mind that these people are created differently...with extra love in their hearts. I owe them so much...I think about the hours spent in the NICU and how they became my world, my support system. I have been so touched by them and not a day goes by that I don't think about the love and tenderness they showed my son every day. I wish there were the right words to express my thanks. I hope and pray that you all truly know my gratitude. Thank you so much for the magnificent impact you have made on our lives. You are all part of Benjamin's story and that is amazing.