Down

I'm feeling down. Overall Benjamin had a good day. But when I got to the hospital tonight and went to change him I noticed his belly was really red...and he did not like when the nurse touched it. So the doctor did an x-ray and noticed a swollen area in his intestine. She wasn't sure if it was swollen because of surgery or if something is actually going on. So bloodwork is being done as we speak...Benjamin is a champ. He didn't even cry when they stuck the long Iv needle into his head. He's definitely stronger then I am. If his red/white blood cell ratio is out of wack it will indicate he may be fighting an infection. If that's they case they will start him on antibiotics right away..if they are fine they will call the surgeon to come in and have a look. I'm so scared. How much can his little body take? Pray that everything will be ok and that I can stay strong for him.

Bumps

I will never get used to the bumps in the road. Benjamin is doing pretty good. But the stopped his feeds around 4am when things weren't really digesting that great. So here we are back to square one. We were told that it would probably go that way, but a part of me was hoping that it would all go smoothly. The doctors have now mentioned a lower GI x-ray. They will give him an enima of dye and that will show up on an x-ray so they see if the intestine is clear, narrowed or blocked. Obviously I don't want him to go through that, but it would be nice to know for sure whats going on in there. So we have to wait and see if thats the way it will go. He is still so swollen and all of the nurses seem to think it may just be to early for him to eat. So everything will be reassessed in a few days. Pray pray pray that there is no blockage...if there is he'll need surgery again. We're trying not to worry about that yet, but its hard....

A big day

Today was a big day. There was lots of excitement and changes. This morning when I got to the hospital there was a crib waiting for Benjamin. So I helped the nurses get him all switched over. We weighed him and he is now 5lbs 5oz and we even put a little diaper shirt on him. It was so nice to say good-bye to the incubator. It was a big step. Then this afternoon when Jon go there he had been moved. Finally we're out of the back room. The back room is where all the babies go first and as they get better they get moved out. Well we've been there since the beginning and have watched a lot move out. So it was so great to see that he is out of the back room. Then when I got back there tonight they were just starting feeds. So he's getting 1ml of breastmilk every 2 hours. Such a small amount, but still something. Now we just pray....pray that everything will function normally and his body will start doing what its supposed to. His tummy is still very swollen, but his incision looks great. I'm thankful for all the big steps today, but still very worried that things won't go according to plan. These next few days will be so important to Benjamin's progress so more prayers are appreciated.

Happy

I feel really happy today. Benjamin is doing so good. I got to hold him again for the first time in a couple weeks. It was so nice just to cuddle. There has been talk of starting feeds soon. The doctors wanted to wait a couple more days. They have been suctioning his feeding tube, keeping an eye on what is in his tummy. Over the past few days there has been less bile, which is what they are watching for. As things start to work again there will be less and less so we are making progress. They definitely don't want to rush anything. Benjamin also had his eyes checked today. They are excellent. Preemies are at risk for a condition called retinopathy of prematurity, but he doesn't have it...We are thankful for that. We still don't have a crib...the NICU is pretty full, but tomorrow there are supposed to be a few discharges so I'm hoping it will happen then.

Waiting

Right now we're waiting. I haven't been able to get any clear answers from the doctors about when Benjamin can start eating again. I don't want to rush things obviously, but I'm so anxious about it all. The nurse today said she could here bowel sounds in his tummy which is a good sign. Before his second surgery they could barely hear anything. So that makes me hopeful that things are starting to work. His incision looks great. He's still pretty puffy, which you can see in the picture, but he is starting to move around a lot again so he'll get rid of the fluid that has built up.

Benjamin did great today off the ventilator. He has brief apnea episodes due to the morphine, but recovers well on his own. They have been weaning every 12 hours so hopefully in a few days he'll be completely off it. He was awake lots today he is very serious and seems to be taking everything in when he's awake. Tonight the nurses were even going to move him into a crib...but they didn't have any. What a bummer. I can't wait to get him out of the incubator. So hopefully in the next couple days he'll have a big boy bed.

Will power

My little man has will power. He had a good day today. He seemed to be very peaceful. He got another transfusion today. His hemoglobin was low, most likely from blood loss during surgery. The morphine has been lowered again and he's pretty comfortable. But tonight when daddy arrived at the hospital he lifted up the blanket to take a peak into the incubater Benjamin was in the process of extubating himself. He hates the tube in his nose...and for him to be able to remove that tube with all the tape he needed to have a lot of will power. I'm hoping he'll be able to manage on high flow, but there is a chance he will need to be re-intubated because he is on morphine which suppresses his breathing. So fingers crossed he'll do well on high flow.
Anyways, all is well. I'm hoping tomorrow we'll get some answers about when he can start to eat. I think they will send a dye through his system and then do an x-ray to make sure there are no leaks before they start feeding. I'm so anxious to get that started. I just pray everything will function properly.

48 hours

Well we've made it through the most critical period post surgery and I am so thankful for that. Benjamin had another good day. He's been consistantly stable with no major bumps. The doctors have started to slowly wean him off his morphine and today he tolerated it well. The rts have also weaned down his ventilation and he seems to be doing well with that. He was awake for quite awhile and was looking around at what was going on. He's starting to move around more and has been grabbing at his tubes. I wouldn't be surprised if he extubated himself in the next few days. He still is very puffy from all the fluid build up. The nurse weighed him tonight and he was 5lbs 9oz...which is a huge jump. When he's gotten rid of all the fluid I think he'll be closer to 5lbs. We are so incredibly thankful for his progress and pray he continues to get better.